Update...not so up.

Well I just got the call from Ryan. His last day before the layoff is next Thursday. I thought I was taking it all pretty well and trusting in the Lord, but somehow it all just hit me. Wow! I don't know if I was hanging on to the hope that maybe they would decide he is just too good an employee to let go or something like that, LOL. I also kinda thought he would have had a lot more offers, but still not one interview. Let me tell you all, it is bad out there. I am amazed at how devoted and hardworking Ryan is with his job search. After working 8 hours, he comes home around midnight and will be up till at least 3 am searching over the internet and sending out resumes. He can't even find jobs making half of what he used to. We loose our vision benefits by the end of the month, but thankfully get to keep our health and dental benefits for three months. I've rushed to make all the Dr.'s appointments to make sure everyone has their bodies, eyes and teeth checked out before the insurance elapses. Most all the Dr.'s have been flexible and understanding. Unfortunately our general Dr. will be gone nearly the whole month of April on a mission trip so we will have to wait till he gets back to get Thomas in for his 3 year old check up. Please pray for us and the Lord's provision for our home. As Christians there is often the misconception that we are strong enough to handle anything, but the truth is we have struggles and heartaches just like the rest. Will we let it consume us? Well I hope not. I hope that even in our despair we will look to the Lord. Could we have planned better for this? Probably not. We actually had savings when we got married, but it was washed out when we were both laid off, got pregnant and totaled our only reliable car in the first two months of marriage. From then on we began paying debt and rebuilding everything. We were actually just beginning to get a foothold when all this came about. It's easy to say, quit spending, but we still need food, clothing and shelter. My husband even is astonished at how thrifty I can be. I have never met a Goodwill or sales rack that weren't my friend :). I know we will get through all this and one day look back at this tiny glimpse of time and think, man that was nothing, but for now while we are going through it, it hurts. Hurt is good though, because it means we are living. It is only the dead who don't feel hurt.